by Mokaya Omweri
My name is Mokaya Omweri. I am the author of Stubborn Determination: Reflections of a Village Boy at Thirty. It is almost three years since I published the book. The thought to write my story first occurred to me in 2006. I had just completed my secondary school education and was waiting to join university. My high school life had been such a bad experience. I stayed out of school for much time because of a recurring eye problem. My fellow students would also laugh at my not-so-common physical features: a relatively big head, poorly arranged teeth and abnormal snoring while sleeping as a result of a persistent respiratory problem. At around this time, though I had grown seeing him always drunk, my father’s alcohol addiction started getting into my nerves. Sometimes I would miss school because he could not pay fees in time. He was not even bothered that my eye problem was getting worse. As a family, we endured the abusive and disorderly behaviour of my dad. As a result of all this, my self-esteem was on an all-time low. I wanted to write to heal.
After high school, even with the urge to write, I could not bring myself to putting together my life experiences into a book. Memories of my scars were still fresh in my mind. I found myself crying a lot whenever I remembered certain experiences and episodes of my life. A few pages into telling my story, I abandoned the writing project altogether. I questioned the structure and form of the manuscript. It was riddled with so many errors. I wondered who would read such a poorly-scripted story. I moved on with my life.
One day during my university vacation, my dad got injured while coming from a chang’aa drinking spree. With the physical injury, the police were able to arrest him. I had no money to facilitate my return to university for the start of my third year. Still, I had to do everything possible to get my dad out of police custody and to take him to hospital. I cried a lot. Because of my experience during this episode, I later swore to never again cry over my dad’s situation or any other bad situation but instead to use such experiences as an opportunity. Because of this resolve and transformation, I started to write again, this time not only to heal but also to inspire other people in similar situations. Midway through my second attempt, I got stuck again. In 2017, I experienced untold tragedy and a long-lasting blessing: I survived a urinary tract blockage after two surgeries; and Nadia, my daughter, was born. These events, in a way, pushed my writing project to the finish line. At this point, I no longer cared about the imperfections in my story or the editorial errors in the manuscript. I least worried about exposing myself. The big question—what if I had died then?—motivated me to tell my story as it was.
Writing about my person—big head, poorly arranged teeth, snoring, among other personal challenges—was not easy. Writing about my family, especially my dad, was even more difficult. I felt stripped naked. Yet I had to write about all this. I often wondered how my employers and bosses would look at my tribulations at different workplaces. I occasionally censured my writing so as not to offend anyone through my story, including myself. I could not write about my teenage love life as I had wanted to for I worried that my wife, who was my first alpha reader, might get offended. I do not regret writing my story the way I did though. The book has so many publishing quality issues. There are a few grammatical errors and plot inconsistencies in the book, but I love it that way. It was my first book. I wrote it despite the fact that I was not so good at English or writing. I had to educate myself online about writing. If I were to write the book again, I would not change much.
My family and friends warmly received the book upon its publication. My family was happy that one of their own had achieved something despite all the challenges we had been through. Most of my family members, including my dad, attended the book launch. My colleagues at One Acre Fund honoured me in a way I had not anticipated: They chose Stubborn Determination as the book of the month at the organisation’s book club that I was part of. I am usually surprised whenever I come across a review of my book by people not known to me. Sometimes I bump into people who tell me that they are happy because I wrote to and for them. That gives me satisfaction.
One afternoon after the book launch, I bumped into Ken in one of the many kitchens in our office. Ken was a junior HR officer then. He was a realist gentleman. He had long given in to fate. He acknowledged that our employer underpaid us. But he was convinced he had no option but to stay put for the sake of his family that depended on him. “Man, you should not be here. With your talent and energy, you are wasting your time here,” Ken told me. This got me thinking. At this time, almost everyone was reading my story at the office. Even though I had written to heal, this exposure in a way felt too much for my introvert self. I wanted to run away from reality. The response the book was receiving opened my imagination. I wanted to realise the unexploited potential that the likes of Ken were seeing in me. After about two months of marketing Stubborn Determination, I realised that I was living below my potential. As a result, I resigned and started life as a social entrepreneur, helping poor women acquire cooking gas cylinders. I took up this challenge as part of my mission and contribution in making sure that other children would not grow up in the smoke that I believe affected my respiratory system. I also believed my decision could open more and better doors for me.
Though teenage and young adulthood are such a difficult time for one to write his or her story, I encourage young people to document their life experiences. It is the best thing a young person can do. Auto/biographies on or by youths are to young people what strategic plans are to companies. Writing my story helped me to refocus the trajectory of my life. I am currently working on ‘Burning the Bridges: a Covid-19 Pandemic Memoir’, a sequel to Stubborn Determination. I hope to launch the memoir by the end of this year.
Stubborn Determination: Reflections of a Village Boy at Thirty is available in local bookshops.
Write to editor@nairobibookshelf.com.
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